Face Painting Hilarity

A fabulous! (un?)intentional humor example: This kid went to get his face painted and ended up looking diseased. 

The suspicious part is that every kid who had a face painting at this Sand Sculpting Festival at Revere Beach looked disturbingly grotesque.

The question is: Face Painter with a vengeance? Or Face Painter who just plain sucks at art?

Your (Facebook) Post Makes Me Comatose

Dear Facebook Users,
Why is it that you insist on updating the masses on every trivial detail of your life? Things like "Getting ready to eat dinner" or "Shopping for tampons" are not even remotely interesting to me or anyone else and frankly, if this is all you can come up with to report, then neither are you. Or at least this is a consideration that goes through my mind every time I read about you taking a piss or doing other such unremarkable mundane activities. I mean, cmon, I know you aren't really that lame otherwise I wouldn't be friends with you in the first place. But when you post these nonsense details, please realize that it does make me question the idea that maybe you are this boring in real life too. And if you are one of those people I haven't spoken to for ten years, I really have nothing other than your Facebook posts to go by.

Have you noticed your number of Facebook friends declining?

The Doctor Impostor - Time to Investigate

A while ago, I posted a note about my suspicions that the Dr. Pepper fountain soda sold at the Harvard Coop may not in fact be the real thing. It has taken me several months, I realize, to take action on this matter, as I promised, but I finally got around to inquiring about this yesterday.

Dial-a-Pizza: Voted #1 Pizza Joint in the Fenway District of Somerville, MA

If you live around, work near, or frequent Beacon Street in Somerville, close to the Cambridge border, you most likely are familiar with Dial-a-Pizza.

What do you think of this place, just curious?

Because I have very mixed emotions about them, which fluctuate between love and hate with every interaction or encounter with the pizza joint and its employees. This has resulted in not only my own internal conflict on several late late night occasions when starving and they were the only place open and available to give my business to but (my frustration mostly) has also yielded a few Smileys.

The Biscuit: Pros, Cons, and Absurdities

The Biscuit coffee shop on the corner of Washington and Beacon Streets in Somerville is one of my favorite cafes to spend time in. They have killer baked goods- always fresh-, excellent coffee drinks and really groovy music. In fact, I would almost venture to say they are a 10- nah, nobody is really a 10- okay, they are almost a 9.5 when 1 is intolerable and 10 perfection, but if I could magically take over the place and make some improvements, these are a few things I would change:

But We Don't Use the Yellow Pages Anymore

Every year, around the same time, I receive 2 gigantic, thousand-pages long, phone books on my front door step. Yellow Pages and White Pages. Then, within a week, I receive 2 more. Since I have been a regular adapter of technology since 1996 or so, I prefer to use the internet or my Smartphone to research phone numbers of businesses and individuals. I don't think I need to get into the numerous reasons why the internet is superior to a physical phone book for these things.

So usually when receiving these books of wasted paper I just put them inside somewhere and forget about them until they build up over the years and take up too much space. I have absolutely no use for them, but I always feel bad just throwing them out before they've at least had the chance to collect a layer of dust.

But the last time around when the books were delivered, I noticed that I was nowhere near the only person who found them unnecessary and unwanted. Probably about half of the houses in my neighborhood had their delivered books sitting untouched where they had originally been dropped off on the porch for up to 2 months after they were received.

Rite Aid Got Smileyed!

Rite Aid Store #10161, located on Somerville Avenue in Somerville, MA is a great retail pharmacy and drug store, with a great selection of merchandise, and consistently great discounts.

This is great.

What is not, is that I noticed over a 2 years span of time that the refrigerated drink coolers, plain and simply, reeked. Like rotting milk.

So I sent Rite Aid a Smiley to alert them.